I’m unfriending everyone (except the following) on Facebook

fb-thumbs-down-2As it’s apparently becoming cool to unfriend people on Facebook and then blog about how you’ve unfriended people on Facebook, I’ve decided to fall in line with this coolness. I felt it only appropriate to announce to anyone with whom I may be “friends” on Facebook what I am doing, so I posted the following announcement on my account.

As you probably don’t even use Facebook anymore (the 12 readers of this blog being leading-edge cool people), I figured you wouldn’t see my announcement on Facebook, so I’ve decided to re-post it here:

Please don’t include me in any “trend” story, but the increasingly intrusive and annoyingly irrelevant nature of Facebook’s advertising is making it easy for me to scale back how I use it.

However, I WILL NOT be un-friending anyone who belongs in one of the following categories:

  1. Anyone from Nashville or Tennessee or parts of Alabama, Georgia, the Carolinas, Virginia, Florida, southern Kentucky or DC, New York City and Boston, unless you are annoying. (That “annoying” part goes for the rest of these, also).
  2. Anyone to whom I’m related (see #1, annoying exception) or seems to be good friends with someone to whom I’m related
  3. Anyone with whom I’m told I attended any school (especially if your profile lists a timeframe that over-laps when I attended those schools).
  4. Anyone who seems to have a connection with schools my children or wife attended.
  5. Anyone who is a fan of the Tennessee Titans
  6. Anyone I’ve ever worked with or belonged to some kind of board or association or church or Triple-A (did I mention the annoying exception?)
  7. Anyone I think makes me look cool because they follow me.
  8. Anyone who may be famous to 15 people.
  9. Anyone named Rex.
  10. Anyone who regularly posts photos of their dogs being funny.
  11. Anyone who posts photos of their kids, grandchildren, nieces and nephews doing anything smart or cute or athletic or creative.
  12. Anyone I actually may know who doesn’t fall in the previous 11 categories.