Swinging customer service

Today, I received what has to be one of my favorite e-mails of all time. It was mailed to Hammock Publishing’s info@ address:

I recently purchased a hammock and stand from your website and was very disappointed to find that the shipping information was less than accurate. When prompted to choose a shipping service, I chose UPS ground and was provided with a delivery date of 8/6/02. I’ve attempted to track my order several times only to find “order being assembles” as the only insight to
the location of my shipment. A call to your customer service number availed me of the knowlege that these items actually drop ship from your vendor in North Carolina adding more than a week to the origal quote. Not the end of the world, but disappointing to say the least as this is a wedding gift and we ordered for a delivery window based on your estimates.

So as not to give “hammocks” a bad name, I emailed the sender back to let him know he was tied to the wrong tree. I also told him that, despite my name, I have never owned a hammock.